Lying or Paying

These are some excerpts from a article i read

" A 27-year-old advertising professional from Delhi, is one such male who believes in hard work, hard cash, and holidays in Thailand, Amsterdam and Rio. He says with the excitement of a new convert, "Earlier, I would meet a pretty girl in the office and try to strike up a conversation.
It would take considerable effort to cut through her airs and graces and get talking. The topic of the conversation would be a pain to me, but I would pretend to enjoy every moment. After a few days she would be ready to go out for coffee. This would be followed by a mind-numbing movie. Then another round of coffee.

A month would have passed by now. I would still be in hot pursuit. A few weekends later would come the big day for dinner. After the dinner I would, chivalrously, drop her home. And the next day, just when I would expect my big moment to come, I would find her chatting animatedly with the idiot from marketing. What a waste of effort."

But success in love brings a new set of obstacles. "Many a times you do succeed. And you also end up making love. But then, very quickly, you also fall out of love and start fancying other girls.
And then it gets damn difficult to break free from the woman," says Soumik Naskar, an 18-year-old undergraduate student of information technology at the Government Engineering College, Kalyani, West Bengal. "It's being unfair to the woman. You know you are in it for sex. So why keep up the pretence? Why not go straight for the nookie by paying for it?"

The new experiment of Indian men with breaking away from social norms and finding love in the commercial place is at a higher state of evolution in the First World. According to a report which appeared in the British Medical Journal in 2005, the percentage of British men who paid for sex had increased from 5.6 in 1990 to 9 in 2000.

But the element of surprise lay in the details. It was not just the fat slob, the sex worker's client stereotype, who was visiting brothels. The study found an increasing number of successful, attractive men in their mid-twenties to mid-thirties opting to pay for intimacy.
Shekhar Verma, a student of advertising and public relations at the Indian Institute of Mass Communication, New Delhi, says, "In my institute, the boys are out to get the prettiest girls, while the girls are out to get the guys with the best bikes, best mobiles and rich dads. And there's no such thing as love. So if some men have stopped being hypocritical, what's wrong with it?"

The tragedy is, says Srivastava, "that though men appreciate the needs of women, women don't of men. They expect us to listen to and understand everything they say, but don't realise they are driving us crazy. Women simply rob you of your happiness. "

Now this article does not reflect my views about the issue . I feel this does happen but not with all girls. Only very few are like this .

But yeah i kind of believe in the principle. Some of the girls nowdayz reflect such absurd behaviour .They just want to flaunt attitude . They just look sometimes on the pockets , and other times on the face . They are too busy being snobbish.Even if you want to do friendship , you have to go through all the 'PROCESSES' of qualification by the girl .

So just for the sake of sex , you have to pretend to do so many things you hate to do . Some people manage to make all the sweet talk and get the best girls . But even they dont mean much . Still they get sex . And others still who are strong on their principles , might not be able to woo the girls . Thus they are branded as losers many-a-times.

When you can get love , friendship and intimacy for money , and without lying whole day , isnt it better just to pay up for sex. rather than just go through the stupid 'PROCESSES'

Music

As new music is created every-day... so do my tastes and experiments with music change fast...
One of my all time favs is Aadat....i can listen it anytime...
but currently i m listening to raeth..bhula do... and backstreet boyz -never gone

raeth produces b'ful music... with guitar part the best... and lyrics to touch u..
listen to it sometime

A day

I wake up in the morning...
See the sun shining bright...
A wave of happiness
passes by me...

I pray to god then...
to keep the day as beautiful...
as it is now...
maybe he/she would listen...

somedayz are not so good..
somedayz are not so bad..
but the only one i could tell...
is no one till the end..

sometimes i walk by the moonlight...
feeling the closeness with stars....
yes i have some-one to tell...
the moon, the night ...nd the dark...

i could be sad ...
for what i havent got...
but i am happy...
that maybe someone else has got my share...

coz to cry over lost things...
is waste of time ...
and time is life...
and therez no use wastin this b'ful life...

And when i switch off the light..
finally in the night...
i feel the sense of comfort..
with dreams engulfing me by...

yes now i would be united to my own-self...
cuz what i yearn for is nothing but a part of me...

Wisdom Line

I found this quote on one of my frnz profile ...

" A ship is safest at the sea-shore , but that is not what it is built for "

sometimes a sentence can speak the whole wisdom of centuries preceding us , and this is one of them.

Purpose

I sometimes seek a purpose... of creation or salvation or wt'vr 'ion ...
When its said that we orignate from the universe and end with it.. why are we created...

But it just so happened one day... dat i was walking simply.. and casually just broke off a leave from a tree... and i kept walking .. now walking is boring... so i started thinking... and once i got on the philosophical thinking... i suddenly got a though ..a idea...and it was startling...
It was based on concept of God.. so this explanation is for Theists..and also for Atheist's who might want to think unbiasedly...

Lets say a plant ... why is it here.. It grows from the soil...and after dying it is decomposed into it.. there is nothing .. no target it has to acheive.. then what is the reason of it being here... One possible explanation is that it is here to feed the human's ... for sustenance of life .. it is very necessary for plants to be there. So let's say even though a plant has a normal life..and no particular destiny for itself .. it is there for a higher cause ..for sustenance of human's

Now lets consider us as plants and universe as humans...
So for sustenance of universe ... we go through the cycle of life...but help in sustaining the universe...

Now if consider the universe to be a plant ... and god to be human ( not exactly ...)
Thus universe sustains god ...

SO maybe it might be possible that we go through the cycle of life so that god might continue to be present ... So that might be our purpose ...

I personally find this concept viable but not appealing to myself...

A Weekend in IIT G

A weekend in IITG...

For all those who dont know me...and reading IIT ... might be thinking... a weekend... means catching up with studies...studying for the next paper... completing reports... making projects...and if they get tym for reading some good techincal books...

Its not even .5% like this...


But first i need to find out what a weekend is????... If that's wen u dont have classes...i gotta weekend 5 days outta 7...( only me !! hehe)

But by conventional rules, the weekend starts on Fri Evng...
What all there is to do in a weekend...

Sleep ... I have done that whole week...
Movies... Same Shit Different Day...
Go to Guwahati City... the girls are beautiful...the malls are few...and coffee is acceptable... not much to look forward to...
Sports..nah i am not into that...
Music...maybe...i can listen to musik every second...
Studies... Dont even think about it... ;)
Internet... Yeah dat onez different... full day orkuttin...smthn different than weekdays.. :)
Reading..for me yes... but most consider it the worst way to spend a weekend...
TV ... heard of it somewhere...whatz this newyz???

And the whole weekend passes by speculating what shud be done on a weekend...
Any new suggestions ..feel free...even if they maybe weird...

Life , somewhere far away!!!

There is a fundamental question , what is Life? Do we say all terrestrial bioforms to be life. Life could have some other meaning too.

Living Organisms are examples of organized energy and complexity. But then Crystals which are highly organized structures and can even reproduce are not considered as living .

All forms of life work on electromagnetic forces . But then a galaxy is also a gravitationally organized system . Is it living ? Even if it is , light would take say 100,000 years to cross Milky Way. So the thinking time of galaxy would be 100,000 years and other processes much slow to observe.

Another question is that does more life exist in universe ? There are 100 billion stars in a galaxy and there are about 100 billion galaxies . Now considering the huge number of stars , the total planets would be enormous . Even if the probability of an earth like planet being very very minute . Still it is possible that few planets like earth might exist where conditions are suitable for life.

So maybe there is someone out there waiting!!!!

Size , Density and 10^40

Now many of us do wonder , what the size of universe is? Most consider it to be infinite. But there infact exists a horizon , that can also be considered as the size of universe , because what happens out of this horizon cant be found out.

This horizon is like a spherical bubblie centred on earth , with a radius of 13.7 billion light years and expanding at at rate of light moving outwards.

The reason for this is that we currently can only view light coming from a object 13.7 billion light years as light oculd have travelled only that much distance as of yet. As time passes , more universe comes into our view.Anything beyond this region cannot affect as potentially no information can be transferred .

One important fact is that the density of universe needs to be less tahn 5 g/cm^3 . If its more than the gravity would crush it soon into nothing . But even if it very very less than this , than universe would expand very very fast and thus no stars or galaxies could form . Currently it is estimated to be at .0211 g/cm^3 .

IN 1974 , Stephen Hawking gave a new result that black holes are continiously emitting radiation . The radiation increases with mass increase . And as mass is related to area of the hole created due to gravitational distortion increase with time , the black slowly radiated away its mass and dies .

Now there is another very peculiar and stunning result . There is a ratio 10 ^40. Lets call it X

1.Now when we measure the ratio of strength of electromagnetic force to gravitational force among atoms . It is X
2.If we measure ratio of most largest unit of time ( age of universe @ 13.7 billion years ) and smallest time unit ( time period of oscillation of nuclei ) . It is X
3.If we compute the lifetime of a star on it is X times the fundamental subatomic units .

4. If we find out total number of atoms in our horizon ( limited universe ) it turns out to be X squared .

Reality...What is that??

Now Quamtum Theory and all such theores link to metaphysics and other fascinating concepts.
What is Reality ? It is a very intresting thought and subject to constant speculation.

Now when a particle explodes into 2 same mass particles , By laws of physics both should have equal velocity opp to each other. If they have spin , it should be equal and opposite. There is a device called Polariser , that orients the given light beam in a particular direction . A single photon might pass through it or it might not , with say equal probability . Now when a particle explodes into 2 photons in space , the 2 photons might be seprated by millions of miles . When one of this pair of photons is passed through a polariser , it may pass or it may not . Say it does .

But what about the second one . It also may pass or may not . But the astounding fact is that it does too always. That is both the photons show same behaviour with similar polariser even
though seprated by huge distance.

Quantum Theory predicts such phenomena and it is experimentally verified.
It says that all possible worlds are waves and they overlap each other. We cannot say anything about the state of a sub-atomic particle before observation .Only when the observation is made , do they seprate into distinct REALITY . Thus if we consider a sub-atomic particle it might be moving in 1 direction or other. Both worlds overlap . Only when we observe the system do we see which direction the movement is in. Only then does a reality materialises . Also the chance of a particular world becoming reality depends on PROBABILITY.

So is reality a concept appearing by our own observation . Appears to be so!!

This view of overlapping universe , only one being realized and others failed was given by Copenhangen. Another view of the reality , was given by Everest-DeWitt. It was used to explain Schrodinger's Cat Paradox much better.

Let's say a nuclei has a equal chance of decaying and not-decaying in 1 second.It is connected to hammer over a sealed box in which a cat is kept . If the nuclei decays , the hammer falls and capt is dead or if it doesnt the cat is alive . The expirement is turned on and switched off at 1s. What happened to Cat? We cant say . It is either dead or alive. Copenhangen view says that it is in a dead-alive state until a person observes it. There are various logical flaws in it . So according to Everest-DeWitt each of the 2 outcome happens in 2 different worlds . As soon as atom decays the world is split into 2 , one with each possible outcome.

Thus this theory says that universe is continiously splitting into stupendous number of universe every second and all possible outcomes are being realized somewhere. And that each of this universe combines to form a superspace.Thus there maybe some universe in which world war 3 has occured and no life is present . Some in which no world -war has occured and there is peace.

Energy: Really conserved?????

After Einstein's paper of light consisting of small packets of energy called photons , it was proven to show that Light showed Wave-Particle Dual nature. that is it behaves both like particle (photons) and also like waves ( by showing interference).

Then hesienberg showed that it is impossible to measure both position and momentum of particle simultaneously. That is if use measure position to very great accuracy then the error in measurement of momentum is very high. Also it is said that waves associated with electrons are probability waves giving prob'y of their position.These were some of the fundamental concepts of Quantum theory , which is now widely accepted to study sub-atomic particles.It is said that all a sub-atomic particle can have any possible position but the it depends on prob'y .


If we consider an infinite dimension vector space. And each direction as a possible world. Then in these infinite directions all possible outcomes of any given event occur. But the one that becomes the reality is the one with maximum probability.

Now another thing that comes from Heisenberg's Principle is that like position and momentum , energy and time cannot be measured accurately simultaneously. Thus if we measure the energy of a particle we take considerable amount of time (which is still very small considering a second ).

Now this concept provides a basis where the principle of conservation of energy is violated.It is highly possible that a particle can borrow energy from universe for some time and has to repay it in time inversely proportinal to energy borrowed. This concept can be used to easily understand why some electrons can tunnel through high barriers even though they dont have enough energy.It also helps to understand production of alpha rays.

Paul Dirac , a prominent scientist , sought a new equation as Schrodinger Eqn was inconsistent with special relativity. When he did found one , on solving he got infinite solutions , one for each energy level.But the astounding result was that he got a negative energy level for each solution .Thus he gave the result of negative energy matter inhabiting all these states . And if an highly energtic photon should be able to create a electron-antielectron or proton-antiproton pair.

Antimatter particles have been found amid cosmic debris. Nowdays , though a more refined form of this theory is used , and it includes pair-creation and annihilation. But to produce a new pair energy needed is so high that when it is borrowed from universe it is for very very short interval. So these pair creation and annihilation keeps happening everywhere but we are unable to feel it due to short duration of time.

These particles so produced are generally termed virtual particles. And each particle is surrounded by a cloud of virtual particle and each virual particle by a cloud of its virtual particle , till infinty. Now these virtual particles have helped explain why 2 same charged particle repel each other and also have helped in explanation of Nuclear force.

Time and Clocks!!!

One incorrect but very common notion is that clocks measure rate of passage of time. Instead clocks actually measure the intervals between time . What is the difference?

We cant really find out how fast time moves , because time is a human-constructed notion .A example , on the basis of theory of relativity states that it is merely necessary to get up from your seat and walk a little to sweep thought thousands of years of reality of some distant star. it means that if while sitting we observe say 1000th yr of that star , after taking a short stroll , we would find that it is 6000th year of star's reality .

Space and Time

The real revolution in Physics started with Albert Einstein's Special Theory of Relativity. the most of important point of which was that speed of Light remained constant however fast you may be moving , wherever you were in universe. It had stunning effects. Thus the only thing that happened when light came from a object that was receding from us was increase of its wavelength.


One of its implication was that if a spacecraft travels very fast , say at 99.9% of speed of Light , still light would seem to travel at 300,000 KM/s . The energy we spend in further increasing its speed starts going into increasing your mass by E=mc2 . But the craft itself doesnt feel any added weight , it instead feels length to contract . So at the speed 99.9%of light it will feel sun to be at mere 4 million miles and would complete the round trip in 44 seconds. But to the observer at earth it would be more than 16 minutes . So apparently the craft has landed in its future.This is the conecpt for Time Travel but practically the energy needed to power the craft could power our present technology for more than a million years .


This concept brought a view of world as 4 dimensional structure with 3 dimension of space and 1 dimension of time.And it thus brought about 2 concepts of time . one is in which we are static and time is flowing by. Another is in which all events are already present . It is us who are moving through those events.


Another implication of Einstein's theory was curving/elasticity of spacetime.First possibilty is that When light encounters a very dense material it is deflected due to gravity and thus
produces a dialation of time. Thus it implies that near a object which has mass of sun and radius of a few miles , the dialation is so huge that time comes to almost a halt. A few microseconds in that time would be more than few billion years to us. Example os such objects are Black Holes . Also there are Binary stars composed of neutron which are highly dense.Second possibilty is due to space shrinking or exapnding . It has been measured that our universe is expanding continiously wit each galaxy moving apart from all others.


Thus these concepts were the basis of remarkable change in view of space and time.

I have Learned a Lesson!!!

The first time i met her was at the Idiscoveri Camp...And we were just casual friends...but i used to be with other people in d camp..so we werent too gud frns..we had emails nd promised to stay in touch..but i wasnt really in touch with her or in fact any1 for nxt 3 yrs...Well den wen i came back to delhi one day i just got to chat with her on MSN...it was real long time...and i just well chatted a bit more..and den we exchanged our numbers..for d nxt few days i just chatted with her more nd more... den one day i called her...nd we tlkd nd it was fun...Then there were the free SMS's that time..and so we got on SMS...and well it was so nice..we use to chat evryday on sms... and soon it was like hvn a real gud frnd....cuz we cud abt nething ..anytime...smthng like alwys dere...


It was a beautiful friendship...cuz i liked her nature...she had a bf ...who she used to say was overly possesive...smtimes she told me tht he had asked her to choose b/w other frns or himself...nd well she finally decided she was goin to breakup...but maybe she could not cuz within few days she was comm again i guess...it was july dat time....nd suddenly i realized dat i had to leave for IIT in july end...We had become really gud frns ( at least i felt tht way ....)
I was to go on maybe 23 july...nd her bday was on 26...so she really used to ask me to plz stay till her bday ...nd well i did think of stayin nd due to some delay in iit admission dates i got a tiicket for 30...so it was a normal day..i hadnt been able to msg her till afernoon so i msgd her as i got time ..the message wasnt delivered so i tght maybe she was in skul nd cell switched off...i waited ...no msg ...not day ..not next day..so i called her up... it said number not in use...i was like wht hppnd ...wen did she chng her number...so i called up on her landline and askd for her...her sis said she was in tuition ...she wud call u later..and aftr tht no calls ...no msgs..nothing...evn on her bday i tried to reach hr..but cudnt...she had all of a sudden broken all links...nd i nvr got to know why...i hv mailed her many times... but since den a year has passed and the only reply i hv ever got is tht..."Something just happened...it was beacuse of you..."


Wht happened...Why such experiences happen in life...I have learnt tht no experience is bad experience or tragedy ...it is just a lesson...but i fail to understand such a lesson...[its like a lesson from quantum mechanics...the only thing u understand is NOTHING... :) ..]

I have thus learned a lesson..tht non every lesson are meant to be learned...some u can just leave for test for Life

A Dream...Before Reality

I had set alarm to wake up on 12 nite @ 6 am... i did wake up but being tired i slept again...i woke up @ 7.30...now the strange thing was tht between dis period i had a dream... nd i could remember eveything about it almst very vividly...

Some sequences are illogical...but then it is a dream...

It strtd in d hostel in evening... maybe at nite...there was some disturbance in iit... as if some harmful elements had entered here...nd we wr in some revolt.. everyone was standing out of their room ... nd suddenly dere was voice of windows breaking in all d rooms.... no-one dared to enter d room... den suddenly derez dis guy holding a gun who appears nd run towards d bathroom... he enters it ... goes in another room inside d bathroom . i dont know why i am seized by a sudden impulse and i run after him ...and i try to close the door of d inner room...but am unable to do so and he comes out... nd fires at me... i remem getting 2 bullets in middle of my chest...nd i fall down...and ppl cry.. and someone comes nd holds my hand..after few secondss..my frst tght at tht point is ..i m gonna die... nd very toughly i speak plz tell richa i luv her a lot... den i reme nd i feel d wound in my chest... not hr8...so i tell ppl to get an ambulance...( not like movies...whr u wanna die )...d next thing i remem in dat dream is i m in hospital and a lady is about to operate on me...nd i m praying fast plz do it fast..my breathing is slowing... den she says it wud hurt nd i said continue....den she cuts open my chest ...nd removes 2 bullets easily...nd i feel pain but not very much...and den she sayz its amazing d bullets did not do much harm... nd i try to look inside my chest wdr some organs have been hurt...nd mybe i believed ntn had so i felt such a wave of relief ...dat i m gonna live... nd den i awoke...

I could not make anything of it...If anyone does...Letme know...

Love

Well i have nothing to do...So i decided to write on a subject on which i have little idea by experience but enough by learning...Its something that brings us immense pleasure...and yest might bring us maximum agony...
Its something you might fall into accidentally...and some mite have accident cuz they hv fallen into it [:)]..
I am talking about love...Sometimes disguised as attraction...sometimes branded infatuation...

To be true by real experience...I have loved ,except my parents and relatives ( some of whom i shudnt have!!!), maybe just one girl...attractions maybe to a few more...but love...real joy ..just one...Her name is secret and she knows it...but i m not as lucky to have her love me back...
In my whole lifetime ( which is a decent 18 yrs now )..I have proposed about 10 girls or round about...Though none is last in almst last 2 yrs...

Now what do we feel is love... Why do we feel it...Is it that love is a cause for living...or living is a cause to love...Whichever way round...we sometimes , in today'z world , dont really fall in love... We simply fall in d trend... Which is to love a girl...go out wid her...

In today's world...Love is mostly a trend , a status symbool to have a gf...You go out and propose to a girl...Then persuade her to say yes...Then u r officially in a relation..and you are GOING AROUND wid d person...even though u literally mite not be...Den it is a duty to call up 10 times a day and start and end conversation wid love u...not subscribingto which u r bound to anger ur luvd one...and then u have to spend xtra time nd effort patching up...den u need to take her out to dates nd dinners...give her gifts..be the frst one in mrng and last1 at nite to talk...and indulging in all d stupid talks ...sometimes lying..sometimes exaggerating...another imp feature is the brakup and patch up which happens frquently just to add up spice...

What is love to me??
Well it is like a form of energy ...the ultimate form of energy...It is when u r in condition to attain enlighten ment...It is wen ur soul is one with the soul of someone else...and words are no longer needed to communicate...
It is a boundless realm ....of energy...and can be dangerous too... Just like our body produces other vital ingredients for us to survive...Love is produced in our body every day... it manifests itself in everything we do...But wht if u r alone... When we r alone...when we hv no one to love...the love keeps on collecting inside us...it searches for outlets..and wen dere r none it strts making us desperate and frustrated...u can feel it pulsating inside ur body wen u have got a chance to love someone...or even be with a gud frnd for some dayz...
Its a hard feeling when kept bottled up... But when expressed truly it is most blissful thing evr to happen to u...

To be happy in life..you need to have and give love continiously...


Ya ...as i havent been in a srys relation i cant say... i m too inexperienced...but i have seen others around me...and now they are undergoing the agony of aftermath of love...But what i think is ...cant it be more simple and exciting...cant it be just the natural way love flows... cant it be tht if i feel something for a person...we can be more of best frns rather than going around... Why is it tht wid a guy best frnd..u dunt hv to tlk whole day to love each other...u can jst be urself...why not so wid someone u really care about.. i have no problem about going out and all... but y d lies.. y d pretending... y the constant need for saying luv u...wen its written all around in air...i fail to understand the modern day love...
I fail to understand myself...

Maybe tht d reason y havent experienced the bliss or agony of love for some years...maybe thts the reason i have no gf... maybe thts d reason i dont have d courage to go up to a girl to tell dat i like her..and wud like to know more about her ...instead of jst proposing her...

Maybe dats d reason y i sometimes feel unhappy...of being alone...

But the only reason i know is tht i write this... so tht d reason might find me...rather than me finding the reason...

Dreams

I looked around...found no-one...
Rubbed my eyes ...was it true...
where are all dose ppl...
who said dey wr wid me...
whr hv dey gone...

I walked d rough road...
nd slipped once twice nd more...
and i waited for a guiding hand...
but found none...

I felt alone in d crowded world...
i felt tears in d crowd of smiling faces...
but now i too feel d joy...
cuz to experience pleasure you need to transcend pain...

i feel a shy smile creep up ..
nd explode into a wave of joy inside me..
cuz i know now i have no1 but me...
cuz now i find enlightenment ...

alone or wid some few i can live...
and do good for it is what i want to be...
and see my dreams come true...
for now i have dem...

A Odd Meeting

Its about 2 months since i met her...nd i think my fear of her..nd others things contirbuted to such a-ve otulook...now i feel i was srysly mistaken...nd shez really gud person...
my apologies...
but i wud keep the post so as to remind me of wht i can mis-understand

I met up with a girl today ... Hmm ... It was the first time i met a girl in guwahati nd a long time anywayz...there should have been excitement ... but god knows why there wasnt any...

1. she was a friend's girlfriend...my friend had asked me to meet her... nd i m not sure she wntd to meet me ... mybe cuz of my frnd she met me

2.He asked me to get flowers and choclates for ... i searched for them a little nd finally got them ... But i took just a single rose... When i had given her that she dint even question it ... She dint really have any intrest or wat i dunno ... She shud have asked y sm1 gives a single unpacked rose ... when d trend is of 10 to 12 rose booke...

3.She was too much in love with a guy she had never even seen ...just talked to over the phone ...and that too for not even 1 month i supp...

4.She had started hating the guy who she loved dyingly for 2 yrs maybe....

5.She had nothin to talk abt except 2 other sweet nd cute guyz ... Who were really nd dearly fond of her but not her bf ... y she nvr told me...

6. Her wayz were jst too expensive for me...

7.She maybe cudnt understand all d hints i said to bring her friend along ... or maybe i speak english very poorly...(?who knows ?)

8.And cuz my intution wich mostly gvz me a gud feeling abt gud person... ws blowing red ...

Still she was really intelligent nd bold nd made me believe dat evry1 feared her ... nd cudnt mess wid her...


And yet lastly ... She perfectly understood dat my life was not really full of girls as her life was full of boys ... I had lived in kota nd now in iit... Girls was a sensitive issue for me...( dont girls ask for d world ?? ) ... and well this reason is equivalent to above 8 nd even more... nd she was too insensitive ...

Had she not been .. maybe she wud have been kind enough to bring a frnd along... or offered a little help ...cuz maybe if she can meet me ...den she trusts me a little ( or my frnd a lot ) ... nd on d same basis a lot of things cud be done...

Yeah i might get upset... But well i wudnt want to just waste my mind resource doing that... so i wrote it all nd now wud frgt it nd not worry